It’s horrible to feel ‘attacked’ by someone else. If we go below the anger and admit to ourselves, the most hurtful of verbal ‘attacks’ come from our partners and our families. And bloody hell! Doesn’t it hurt coming from our children?
Those people that we’ll know for life, that we avoid or haven’t spoken to in years, how much pain does that cause? Really…be honest.
No one attacks unless they feel threatened.
So it’s a good idea to understand why the attack has happened in the first place.
No one attacks unless they feel threatened. They believe that through attacking they can demonstrate their strength at the expense of another’s vulnerability. Attacking someone keeps our own guilt and fear from our awareness and actually preserves the problem.
We think we’ll get what we want from ‘attacking’ or ‘defending’, but we are never going to experience love or inner peace from acting in this way. In fact we’re going to feel like shit about it, no matter how much we try and justify the situation. (And don’t we love to tell others about how we’ve been attacked to try and make us right?)
Fear is really a call for help and therefore a request for love.
You see, attack comes from fear. We express either love, or fear.
Fear is really a call for help and therefore, a request for love.
WE HAVE A CHOICE IN DETERMINING WHAT WE PERCEIVE.
We might think we’re trying to help our kids or our partners by using ‘constructive criticism’ , feeling the need to make a point, that it’ll help them in the long run, but really the truth is we’re attacking them, demonstrating their ‘wrongness’ and our ‘rightness’.
Are we teaching love or demonstrating attack?
If we expect others to change in accordance with our expectations, we’re treating them as guilty and reinforcing our own belief in guilt. Is that what we want to teach the people we love?
Peace comes from not wanting to change others, but merely accepting them as they are. True acceptance has no demands and expectations.
Choosing love give others permission to do the same.
Love is a high powerful vibration. Guilt is a bag of shit basically.
Which will you choose?